ITHACA, N.Y. -- When a romance ends, most couples go their separate way. But sometimes one partner can't let go. In fact, about 20 percent of undergraduates who took part in a survey at two universities said they have been the target of stalking or some other form of intrusive contact by a former partner. And 10 percent of those surveyed, both male and female, said they had targeted a former partner when romance ended.

Of the students who had been the target of intrusive contact, about 20 percent said they feared for their physical safety at some point during the contact. All told, half of the relationships that involved intrusive contact occurred during high school. The studies looked at almost 700 undergraduates at Cornell University and the University of Virginia to see how common stalking is among young adults.

"In our surveys, we found intrusive contact persists for an average of eight weeks. Some respondents, however, experienced intrusive contact for more than two years, showing that this behavior can be very persistent," says Jeffrey Haugaard, associate professor of human development at Cornell and a clinical psychologist. He says the studies also found that nearly 40 percent of students who were targets of intrusive contact said the experience had resulted in a negative influence on subsequent romantic relationships, and even on their lives in general. He noted that since this was a study of undergraduates, it cannot be assumed that the results reflect the experiences of all adolescents and young adults.

Intrusive contact was defined in these studies as unwelcome contact with another person lasting for at least two weeks, ranging from persistent telephone calls to e-mails to stalking to unannounced visits. While some intrusive contact, such as phone calls, is just annoying, other types of contact can be frightening -- such as a former partner appearing at a bedroom window or making threats.

Haugaard and former Cornell undergraduate Lisa Seri, who graduated in 2000 and now is a graduate student at the University of Georgia, published a study on intrusive contact from the stalker's point of view in a recent issue ofCriminal Justice and Behavior (Vol. 31, 2004). This followed an earlier study on stalking after the breakup of romantic relationships among college and high school students inVictims and Victimology (Vol. 18, 2003).

When the researchers tried to predict who might be more apt to engage in intrusive contact, they could find no statistical relationships to family life, income, religious involvement, family closeness, parenting style, level of physical attractiveness, academic performance or the number or quality of friendships.

What can victims of intrusive contact do? Haugaard says they should clearly communicate in writing or in person the type of contact (if any) that they are willing to have with a former partner. If there is a refusal to follow these limits and if the behavior persists, it might be important to involve other people, he says, noting that talking with parents, teachers or others might be helpful.

"Keep a journal of the intrusive contact, and if the contact persists or you become concerned about your safety, you may want to consult with the police or talk with a lawyer, or do both," Haugaard suggests.

Haugaard and Seri have published a series of brochures for high school students and undergraduates to help them cope with being the target of intrusive contact. The brochures are available at http://www.humec.cornell.edu/stalking/index.htm . The site also contains a wide range of advice, including how to communicate effectively with a former partner, how to take steps to remain safe and limit contact with a former partner and how to decide whether it would be helpful to get outside help in coping with the intrusive contact.

The researchers also have published brochures for parents, friends of victims and victims about what to do about stalking. These are available at Ithaca-area high schools (Ithaca, Groton and Dryden) and at Cornell, Ithaca College, the State University of New York-Cortland and Tompkins Cortland Community College. During the next two years, Haugaard will expand his efforts to provide information to schools, police departments and community agencies in four additional counties in New York.

The research is supported, in part, by the Cooperative State Research, Education, and Extension Service of the U.S. Department of Agriculture and by Cornell University.

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